Anybody remember the Classic FAST SHOW Sketch ? " Lets Off Road "

About twice a month at 2am in the bl**dy morning.  2 or 3  Four by Four and Landrover Saddies ' high rev ' it down our road to childishly churn up the 200 yard bridle way / farm track that leads to another road. Obviously one of the sad little b**tards was'nt paying attention because he never quite got to the end of the road !!  Next day saw another fail as four bearded flak jacketed raiders together with a landrover and a big chain could'nt pull it out !! Its still there today getting a wash underneath . " LETS OFF ROAD !! "

I'll meet you there after dark and we'll have the wheels off !!

Best thing for that is to throw a match too it  !!!

I see mr plod was there earlier . He's gone to see the mayor for some advice !!

 The poor old inbred's should stick to pigs."squeak piggy squeak" !!

What really happened was that Ross put a diversion sign halfway down his road directing cars into the ditch , when hears a crunch he's straight out there nabbing their wallets whilst driver's in shock ..Beware anyone visiting him !!!  Should change his name from Lummox to Dick Turpin !!!!!

Hooray ..........all you need in a PONY TAILED leader ! in full off road regalia. 2 pm friday 3 landrovers arrive , line up and strap towing lines together, .............then a quick visit from the police ...........much hand waving and lots of revs from a Captain Mainwaring figure with a white pony tail and nothing ...........then they all climb in the ditch with spades , ramps etc, etc .......Up jumps Capt. Mainwaring shooing local residents and homeward bound drivers in all directions.........Lots more revs and dammit !! out she pops ......... Cue a truly pathetic cuddle huddle with 6 weird fully combat dressed off roaders doing a jig in the middle of the road.......... Jesus HOW they LIVE ! ....... gripped sorted !!

What we collect will always go up in value unlike owning a 4x4 which will just keep on costing you untill you scrap it !! See you soon Jez but promise me no group hugs !!